A Love Song For No One

Katie Melua, in her song, says that there are 6 billion people in the world. I don't have any idea of what's the distribution between men and women since I'm not a population expert but let's say there are 3 billion men and the same for women, it sucks that I can't even find one.

I'm the hopeless romantic type of guy. I guess that's the kindest and acceptable word I could describe myself since I've been denying all this time that I'm already in my desperate stage. At some point I hated the fact that I've wasted a couple of months or even years being with different women that is not really worth all the wait, all the drama, anxiety and emotional investment but I guess that's just really how it works. I came to realize there's no perfect relationship but rather an imperfect situation where both of you would try to live out and accept all those imperfections due to only one reason - you both love each other.

I have known young people who are in a relationship for a very long time like 6 or 7 years or more and when I ask them what's one thing that they hate about the other person, they would say a lot of thing not just one fact that they hate but they say that it's just really how things have to turn. You meet someone. You like her because of a random fact maybe her shampoo or the color of her toenails and vice versa. She likes your sense of humor or your perfect abs. You get to know each other and admit it, even though you're noticing something that is different in her in the first few stages, something that you hate, you still pursue and try to establish a connection. You get blinded by love, share the same umbrella, fight and make all those crazy things and then the most important thing is that at the end of the day, you stay. It's not just the fact that you stay but in most cases, you chose to stay. There's a thin line between those two statements.

Before I went berserk because of my current situation, I guess people really can't live without companionship and at this point of my life, that is the one thing I am most excited about when I'm in a relationship. The cheezy lines, cuddling and even the fighting, oh Lord I miss doing those things.

I guess for now I'll stay on the same bench where I'm sitted and wait. Everything can be done in an instant right now and I'm so over the instant relationshit err relationship. For now I'll keep my love song and all the melodramatic poems and once I found the complete total stranger who would complete the character in whatever love story that God is writing for me, I'll keep calm, cherish those beautiful moments and keep living but this time, not alone.

There are six billion people in the world and it's only a small world for all of us because at the end of the day, we meet the one we love the most of all. I'll keep all those Katie Melua reference the next time.

A Birthday Present

I saw this the other day at a bookstore near Bonifacio High Street. I don't know exactly the story of it inside but the title of the book is a bit catchy.

Few days left before my birthday and I'm already thinking of ways on how I will celebrate my day. It's going to be simple and sure I'm spending it with people I consider special.

The past year has been awesome for me in terms of career and love life so I'm pretty much excited about the coming year. I don't have birthday wishes. I guess just a healthy and safe life would be enough for me to enjoy the rest of the way.

FLICK!

Love really moves in MYSRTERIOUS ways. You just have to really notice and appreciate it once its there.

I'm tired of the "HELLO/HU U?" relationship. What I want now is a "I-WAS-STARING-AT-YOU/I-SAW-YOU-FIRST" type of fling. NO. I don't want a fling. I want a serious one. I need a serious one and I'm sure I can get one - I just need to make sure this time it's for real. 

I'm not hurrying things up. I just want to experience the kind of happiness that I deserve. It's been a long time since I've been into a serious, REALationship. Now I'm willing to wait. I'm willing to take all my chances.

Of Cheesecakes

　

　

I was having a conversation with a friend – a special friend.

　

SHE: tnx. Pinasaya mo araw ko. Ü

ME: araw-araw mong pinapasaya mundo ko. Ü

　

I don’t know when was the last time I felt exactly the same thing I was feeling now. Or maybe iba talaga ang nararamdaman ko ngayon.

Ilang relasyon na rin ang pinasok ko pero isa lang ang alam ko na sigurado – hindi ako nakukuntento at hindi ako naging masaya. Siguro dahil alam ko rin ang dahilan kung bakit ganun ang nangayayari – dahil alam ko na hindi ang ganitong klaseng relasyon ang hinahanap ko pero dahil nandun na ako ay pinipilit ko pa rin na maniwala na magiging ayos ako. PERO LAGI AKONG MALI kaya madalas ay palpak.

　

Alam ko na ang nararamdaman ko ngayon ay minsan lang darating or baka nga hindi na ulit dumating. Kaya ngayon pa lang ay sinisiguro ko na sa sarili ko na hindi ko papakawalan ang ganitong klaseng pagkakataon. At sisimulan ko yan sa pagiging totoo sa nararamdaman ko.

　

　

HONDA-DOT

10PM ang shift ko nitong nakaraang dalawang linggo.. Kung may malaking pagbabago man sa trabaho ko, iyon ay hindi ko na kailangang maging "honda" (on the dot ibig sabihin para sa mga nagttrabaho sa call center). Madalas ay pumapasok na ako ngayon na relaxed at hindi na kailangan ng mahabang paliwanagan kapag late sa trabaho. Pero minsan lang ako late sa trabaho. Siyempre, kailangan ko na maging good example. 

Minsan nagising ako ng sobrang late. Nasobrahan yata ako sa tulog. Malapit lang ang tinutuluyan ko sa opisina - yun ay kung magtataxi ako, na nangangahulugan na dapat may pera ako, na malaking dagok sa budget ko every time na lalabas na ang sweldo. Minsan, ginawang feature article ng FHM ang lifestyle ng mga taong nagtratrabaho sa call center. Pahayag ng mga taxi driver na mapapansin mo daw na taga call center ang pasahero kapag sakto ang bayad na iniabot sa taxi driver. Madalas ay ganun din ang ginagawa ko at marami din akong kilala na kahit wala na ngang pera ay nagtataxi pa din araw-araw. Siguro ganun nga ang realidad ng buhay. Kaya ngayong nagtaas ng singil ang mga taxi, iniisip ko kung gaano kalaki ang epekto nito sa mga call center employees.

Sa mga ordinaryong araw naman ay mas ginugusto ko na kasama ang paglalakad sa pagpasok ko sa trabaho. Wala akong masyadong exercise sa buhay kaya sinanay ko na ang sarili ko sa mga mahabang lakaran. Bitbit ang iPod, lagay ang earphone sa tenga, tali ng sintas sa pinakamahigpit na porma - handa na at simula na ng araw ko. Marami akong nakakasalubong na tao. Hilig ko ang mag sight seeing ng magaganda sa paningin. babae ang ibig kong sabihin. Ang iba sa kanila, posturang postura na tila ba nagbebenta ng encyclopedia. Ang iba naman ay takaw-tingin. Sila yung mga tipong stunner pero dadaan lang talaga - dahil nagkalat din naman ang mga tulad nila. Maraming uri sila pero wala talaga akong paborito. Simple lang kasi ang prinsipyo ko sa mga bagay na ganyan. 

RULE # 1: Lunurin mo na sa titig at wag kang maghangad ng higit pa dun... baka madisappoint ka lang.

RULE # 2: Kung balak mo na baliin ang Rule # 1, humanda ka na.

Pagdating sa opisina, bukas ng PC, magbabasa ng email, magdadasal na sana maganda ang number na lumabas sa nakaraang araw, hanapin ang kinauupuan ni manager at mag-pretend na busy ka at maghanap sa station ng crush ko na ahente kung saan siya nakaupo sa araw na yun.Kumpleto na ang araw ko...at yan ang kadugtong ng kwento ko. 

My Newfound Addiction

WOW! I have not blogged for a month. I was really busy the whole time. I finally have my own team with 15 agents. I'm just excited to give details about the whole transfer experience which I might include in my future blog posts. 

Another thing that has kept me busy was my newfound addiction with torrent files. Seriously, I have no idea about torrent files ever since. I was looking for a copy of the 2010 NBA FINALS between Boston and LA and a friend suggested that I try looking for a torrent file. But hell I don't have any idea about those kind of things. I mean I download music files from Frostwire but when it comes to movies, its either I watch them in theaters or I rent at Video City. I stopped buying those pirated movies in Quiapo since the place mostly sells new movies and most of the movies I love to watch were bit old and rare to find. So I have asked friends who have been experts with downloading movies and they gave me different websites but unfortunately I can't understand any of those things the websites were mentioning like seed, leech and all those stuffs. So to cut the story short I went back to Frostwire since I found out that they are also capable of downloading torrent files (though a colleague told me it might take weeks to download files from Frostwire). I still tried my luck so I typed in Love Actually and double clicked the results and as soon as it started downloading the movie, I almost believe that it might really gonna take weeks before it finished everything. After an hour browsing other Internet stuffs, I went back to Frostwire to check the numbers on how many percentage it has downloaded already. I was shocked when I found out that it's almost done. FAST. I really thought it was bogus so I opened it as soon as it was completed and shoot, its showing Bill Nighy singing Christmas Is All Around which is part of the opening scene in the movie. I almost shouted EUREKA! 

Now, I have like 10 movies in my Netbook that I'm starting to fear my hard drive won't be able to store all movies that I would be downloading in the next few days. I'm now a certified movie pirate. I fear Ronnie Ricketts would barge into my room and get my things and sue me for movie piracy. LoL. 

Anyway, one of the movies I was able to get a copy from Frostwire was about a young John Lennon before he formed the legendary Beatles. It tells the story of how her Aunt Mimi and mother Julia raised her from a small place in Liverpool (which is another legendary place that is part of my bucket list).

Today is my rest day and I'm planning to spend it watching movies I. Certified movie pirate - that's me..!! 

Happy and Engaged

I considered the office as my second home ever since I got in here back in 2009. I was part of the pioneer group when they opened a travel and hospitality account. It was a roller coaster ride ever since I got here. I'm proud to say that in less than a year, I got promoted. It wasn't easy because it wasn't even part of my initial plan but it was all worth it. 

Currently, I'm being retrained for the same account since I left them about 4 months ago and the manager said I need to be retrained. I was thinking that maybe if I was still an agent I would still have the competitive spirit I have back then before every time I am inside a training environment. Today it's totally different. I have a slight edge and I'm in a different position. I should be mentoring these guys. I should be guiding them. When I was told that it would be a 2-week training, the first thing that came to my mind was that it's going to be two weeks of boredom since obviously, I know the background of the account. I was wrong. It feels like I was rebooted. When i did my first mock call the other, there was like a flashbacks of everything that happened to me from the very first day I got here. This is my second coming. 

I was bumming earlier when I tried to Google the name of our company. I was expecting I'll get results from Indian websites since ours is operated by Indian players but I was amazed of how many stories I've read about our site. Gossips, hearsays, love stories and all those things common in call center setting. It was fun. It reminded me of my LOVE-HATE relationship with my company. Indeed, there is no perfect workplace. Issues arise and shit happens. 

I've tried quitting a lot of times and considered transferring for greener pastures. Nothing happened. I'm still here. I guess there's some sort of spell that makes me want to stay. I guess it's the unique kind of treatment you get from people that no matter how fucked up your day is, a random act of kindness from someone will just make it so easy for you. 

I'm still here for no particular reason. It's magic. I have a family.

What's On Your Mind?

Current Playlist: Two Door Cinema Club, Katie Melua, The Smiths, Allison Krauss and a lot of Coldplay. 

I guess I have low attention span. I'm supposed to be blogging the whole night but Facebook, Twitter and a whole lot of coffee refills got in the way. 

Social Network. I've heard Mark Zuckerberg was 2010's Person of the Year. If you can mix farming and spreading rumors in one interface then no doubt that 500 million people will get hook to your so called innovation. I've seen the movie about him as well and I can say that there's nothing to hate about this guy. As what his character said in the movie, he was just crazy, stupid.. and blogging. And making Billions I guess. 

I joined Twitter as well at the start of the year and started playing Cityville. I must say I'm getting hooked to it. I played Farmville when it has just started and it was fun. Unfortunately, work plus the question of how I'm going to spend millions over carrots, onions and potatoes got me bored so I stopped. 

A lot of people are saying Facebook is getting overcrowded. I have no reason to disagree since even my mom who doesn't even know what CPU stands for has her own Facebook account now. In fact during her birthday, she received tons of birthday greetings as if she was a celebrity or something... and she patiently replied to every messages posted on her FB wall. I also have no reason to hate it if it's the only way to meet people you have not seen for like a decade or even more. I guess that's the magic of it. 

From song lyrics to my habitual relationship status changes to Youtube videos of my LSS to my political beliefs and my simple answer to the question What's on Your Mind, this 500-Million club has simply made my life twisted yet simplified. I am proud to be a slave.

Bicolandia Express

Thank you to my not-so-systematic workplace whom I should give A for effort for giving me the best schedule ever in my 2-year experience in the BPO. Well here's the story. They transferred me back to the account where I originally started as an agent before I got promoted as a supervisor. It was actually good news for me. Number is because I love the process so much that I know I can answer any agent's question even with my eyes closed. the second reason is the mere fact that I'm going back there now as a supervisor. No explanations. Just reason number 2 is enough. Haha.

As for the transfer it wasn't the most organized endorsement ever. They told me that since I've been gone for 3 months, I need to undergo training for the same process - a full 2 week training. I call that a full 2-week of petix mode. The thing is that no training class is available this week so I asked if I could go on Vacation Leave instead of bumming at work. I think that's the moral thing that I could do instead of getting paid doing nothing for five days. 

So can you guess what I did with the 5 days vacation? SIMPLE. I packed my things, grab my iPod, went to the bus terminal and after daydreaming for the next 8 hours inside the bus, I was home. So goodbye to crazy traffic, pollution and all those negative stuffs you read about the city in short stories.

I'm basically here just to rest. I'm here just to enjoy being with my family since it's my mom's birthday. So ever since I was here, I just slept, crack jokes with my brother, watch Nat Geo which I am super enjoying, eat spicy foods (yeah I was able to do that), watch basketball and I was surfing the net all day. I super love this vacation. 

Anyways, happy birthday to the most wonderful mom in the world. Enjoy your day Mom. Than you for everything.  

My Professional Bumming Career

Let's talk about my Professional Bumming Career this time. 

I've been working in the BPO industry for less than two years now. Six months with my first company and then a year and two months with my recent employer. Honestly, the reason why I worked in the BPO is the fact I thought its the easiest way to earn money for any undergraduate like me plus the common idea I've had that it's just about answering calls and talking to some fat redneck @sshole on the other side of the planet. Two years ago, I was begging my dad to buy me a LOMO Diana Camera but he told me I need to go find a work and buy the god damn camera with my own money - so I did what he said even though it took me more than a year to fulfill my dream of buying that cheap camera. 

I enjoyed my first few months with my first company. My passion for learning is just incomparable. I was excited with the pay I was getting every fifteenth of the month, my new circle of friends, the western culture that the company is trying to inject, everything was great. But... I came to a point I got tired of it all. I was young, I was partying, I thought my ATM card is forever gonna dispense cash. I quit my job.

I became a professional bum for three months after that. Destiny brought me to my current workplace. I've probably had the same excitement with my previous employer when I joined my recent company. The only added thing is that I know I was here for redemption and I'm not getting any younger again. So aside from late night partying, eat-all-you-can/drink-all-you-can stuff, sex and rock & roll, I know I was in for a different journey. I've tried studying the industry and until now I'm never close to finishing my research. 

In less than a year, I got promoted to a higher position. It's funny because when I told my mom about the news, it seems like she has no idea about what it means. She has no idea about the rat race. She has no idea about how some people could sacrifice friendship, reputation, dignity and put everything at stake for that chance of a higher raise. She has no idea about the crab mentality that has plagued the culture of this industry I'm in. I just laughed about it. 

In my previous post I told you how unpredictable my current workplace is. I love it. I love the suspense and the adrenaline rush. I easily get bored doing the same old stuff so some reshuffling and revamp really helps me challenge myself. It keeps me sane. 

One day at work, I was introduced in a meeting by a colleague as the youngest supervisor in the company. I felt a sudden unexplained feeling about the citation. Should I be proud that I have achieved such a feat so early in my career or should I fear that what I'm actually experiencing was just the tip of the iceberg? 

If there's one lesson I've learned in my less than two years experience being part of this industry, I think it's the fact that I've learned to pay respect to the unique stories of the 350,000 chess pawns that are part of this industry. Each have their own unique amazing story. Mine? I'm sharing it.